


The Nygma and Wayne Detective Agency

by DoreyG



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Detectives, Community: comment_fic, Drinking, Eddie is a bratty brat, Established Relationship, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Riddles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 12:50:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4436138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoreyG/pseuds/DoreyG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"<i>No</i>," he said, with extra force, and rubbed a hand back over his hair. It was too early to drink, it was too early to drink... "For the last time, Eddie, we founded this detective agency to <i>help</i> people."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Nygma and Wayne Detective Agency

"No."

"But-!"

" _No_ ," he said, with extra force, and rubbed a hand back over his hair. It was too early to drink, it was too early to drink... "For the last time, Eddie, we founded this detective agency to _help_ people."

"Really? Because I thought we founded it so that we could actually have sex at work," Eddie offered wryly, and then heaved a huge sigh at the look upon his face, "fine, _fine_. In what way am I not helping people, mr Grumpypants?"

He bit his tongue, so hard that he actually tasted blood. Had to count to ten inside his head before he could carry on, "you are deliberately alienating a large proportion of our potential clientele."

"Oh, I love it when you talk dirty to me," Eddie sighed, actually managed to summon something resembling a scowl after the prompt of some flat staring, "in what _way_ am I alienating them, Brucie dear?"

"You are haughty, disrespectful, frequently rude-"

"I'm not hearing any problems..."

"Dammit, Eddie!" He yelled, and it was a credit to how long they'd been together that his boyfriend only arched an unimpressed eyebrow in reply, "you insist on people solving a riddle before you'll take on their case!"

"Yes," Eddie said, still somehow managing to sound extraordinarily unimpressed, "very true. But I'm still not hearing any problems..."

" _Eddie_."

"People like riddles!"

He stared, for a speechless second of shock, and then shook his head. Turning on his heel, the door was mercifully only a few strides away.

"...Bruce?"

"I'm going out," he groaned, hand already on the knob and dreams of vodka already dancing merrily in his mind, "I may well be some time."


End file.
